toward a sea free from restraint
she does not look up or around
only within
breathing in and out, immersing and emerging
criticism crawls out of her body
as she glides into a confident sheath
peace ignites her core
for the first time she understands awareness
by being seemingly unaware
standing now she rises
her flesh propelled by bone muscle tendon
blood is rushing her heart awake
all love begins with self love
once you know you are the root of your own suffering
choose to disengage from the periphery
harness and recognise the strength inside
to magnetize
breath is the private mantra
guiding prayer
follow your feet knees hips
belly heart hands
be willing to lose your balance
surrender to what matters most
and dive into the unknown"
These are the words of Nancy Levin, poet, from the book 'Writing for my life...Reclaiming the Lost Pieces of Me, A Poetic Journey'
I have recently returned from an absolutely spine tingling soul filling heart restoring weekend in Sydney with a very close friend and soul sister of mine. Both of us searching for that little piece of us which has been hurting, sad, lonely, unanswered, angry, confused etc. From the moment we walked into the room of three thousand like minded people searching for the same, great relief showered us.
This was a weekend of personal growth, grounding, possibilities, awakening and above all hope and faith.
I have come across so many people this month writing and talking about fear. Fear of the evil unthinkable illnesses which are placed in our childrens bodies, fear that we can't control it, fear we can't take away their pain, fear they will never get the opportunities and experiences that any other child would get, fear of lonliness, confusion, sadness and inevitable fear of the unknown.
A dear dear close friend of mine has repeatedly asked 'what are you fearing?' 'why fear it, when it hasn't happened?' it's so so true, but us as humans seem to just plumet into the dark hole of fear. Why? Human conditioning...we are born with only one fear...that of being dropped. We then get conditioned to fear everything and anything! One quote that particuarly resonated with me during the Sydney weekend was that alot of people like to be 'Masterful Problemsolvers' they are good at solving problems, at work, at home, with friends and family. People will go to those people for advice and help with their problems. The problem with this is that you will lead your whole life creating problems in order to solve!!!! If I am talking to you...perhaps you could try to manage this skill with clear boundaries, so you don't live your life full of issues to resolve. I know I am an expert problem solver!
I am so utterly fed up of people living their day to day lives in fear...BECAUSE OF WHAT SOMEONE ELSE SAID TO THEM. What gives them the right to have that power over anyone? I am talking, in particuarly, to the medical profession who admit they have no answers, or suggestions, or guarantees but still....'in their opinion...' NO NO NO. I come across so many families expecriencing the same over and over. I was one of them. Waking up each day dreading what MAY be, what MAY happen and guess what....it never did. Who knows if it happens in the future, but that's not for us to live in dread each day.
I have learnt to dissolve the fear, anger and hate and instead embrace the challenges, journey and lessons which are on offer to me. I feel blessed and at peace with this perspective and hope to encourage others to do the same. I thank my two girls, in particuarly Ruby for choosing me as their mum and bringing these challenges to me now as I have such an amazing life to look ahead at. We all do, just let go of the fear xxx
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